Hares: Cakehole, Pretty Pretty Pedophile, Chicken Dick with guest hares How’d He Do Me & COMB for a few feet.
Hounds: Diaper Rash, I’m Not a Cock, Rambush: First Blood, No Pussy for You, Spank Bank, Crusty Panties & Just Chase, Tranny Head, TMI General, Semper Pi, In & Out, Flaming Cunt Waffle, Aim it at My Face, Just MMM, Just Jack, Ball Wench, Honey Hole, Just FFF, Cock Lobster, Just FFF, Coxcyckle, COMB, Udderly Fuuuucked, How’d He Do Me, Ring Around the Russell, Used Virgin, Broken Boner, Olive Dick, Mother Inferior, BFF & Donkey, Vagina Ghihad, Show & Tell, Do Me More, Just Larry (I think), Just Charity, Just Christopher, Just MMM, Black Box, Asti Spunk On Me, Analytical as a very late cummer
Virgins: Just Christine, Just Paul, Just Andy
The trail started out with in a cluster before the pack even arrived. The hares agreed to meet at 12:45 to finalize their plans; this would have worked out if Chicken Dick had not left his life in Ring Around the Russell’s car and his own car at COMB’s house. P3 took the theme to the extreme and looked like a mix between a supersized smurf and Willy Wonka’s Umpa Lumpa that got stuck on a stretching machine. His hash foot superbly welded and affixed to the top of his truck was very stylish though. Chicken Dick & How’d He were donning their Porn Stars so Udderly felt compelled to put his on. COMB knew all along he was going to celebrate his affiliation and arrived at the hash already wearing his star. Russell decided to go for it as well, but his star lost a little luster when Used Virgin decided to wash it shortly after arriving home Saturday.
Circle and on start was uneventful. Trail went like usual trail with the FRB’s getting ahead of the pack but then being joined back together when the rest of the pack were on then off again on trail. It was almost like a Turkey Eagle split that packed organized since the 3 hares could not handle one today. In traditional Cakehole style, he got lost on his own trail but did find himself before the pack did. The porn stars did trick him even though they did not realize, I guess Uddlery from a distance can look like CD when adorned in a gold star & Speedo. Steep hills and minimal clothes leads to very dirty hashers.
The first BN was rather entertaining, civilians driving by trying to figure out why 45 people were drinking in a little parking lot. Still not sure why, but Udderly & COMB decided to lie on the gravel instead of the nice sot grass that was 3 foot away then CD saw the perfect opportunity to practice his moves on them. At some point, CD decided not continue haring which is why COMB & How’d He decided to step in. The now 4 hares took off down the drive heading toward Ann Arbor Road only to have How’d He bite it right on the gravel. This experience caused COMB to second guess his haring choice and return to the pack to comment that ‘there were cars’. I guess he and How’d He had not realized that there were cars driving down the road and that they might even have the right of way.
The second leg of the hash had varying degrees of interest depending on where you were. The walkers had a well laid trail with rather tasty Mikes Blueberry Lemonade. Just Charity felt compelled to play in the blue chalk and ended up looking like a Smurf Spoodged on her. The runners had a trail that was a little harder to follow, maybe had something to do with hares drinking before running, just maybe. It could be that one of the hares decided to drink the FRB that was supposed to be left for the pack. Not sure when the pack figured out that they were heading back to the same place for the 1st BN, but that is a pretty good trick.
Circle and the On After were a blur for many of the hashers. Could have been caused by the blueberry vodka on trail or the fact that several hashers decided that DWD was the place to be Saturday. We had several auto hashers and Rambush introduced the perfect new song El Camino for the occasion. Being a porn star had its benefits or detriments during circle, because when one star drank all stars drank. CD arrived rather late to the on after and was told at least twice by the bar staff to put a shirt on while How’d He was allowed to hang out in his full porn star goldness. My night ended with one hasher after striking out with the waitress, telling her that he was going to masturbate to her tonight. I think I am going to hear ‘what the fox says’ in my nightmares for awhile.