Cinco Hash Trash
Slight recap of the week leading up to “Cinco Hash Detroit 2014”. The hares gathered in a remote section of Ypsilanti to scout new territory not knowing what we would get into. The “Tres Amigo’s + Halfrican” start blazing trail, all is good so far, trail is wide and flat (Insert inappropriate MOM joke here). One mile in and all looks promising, hares split up scouting trails in every direction. As you can tell, that ended badly. Between the ticks, dead deer carcasses, raspberry bushes shredding skin and Halfrican smelling like dead rotting fish, this was not a good choice. Thursday afternoon quickly passed and still no trail had been agreed on. Friday morning and panic is starting to take over, messages flying back and forth, and it’s too late to run for the border, and not Taco Bell. In a last ditch effort I spun the globe! Around and around it goes, where it stops, who the Fu-ck knows! MEXICAN TOWN! Bingo, it’s ON-ON!
Sunday, hares arrive early and feeling nervous about the task at hand. Sombreros and police everywhere! We set up camp thinking if worse comes to worse we drink! Hashers start arriving and it’s all coming together, food and beer and everybody’s happy! Chalk talk is quick as cops are hovering close by, my unrehearsed, unplanned gibberish flows like a two year old reciting Shakespeare. As we name off around circle I quickly realize that we are all really bad at Spanish, but we can definitely dress the part. Gang bangers, Luchadores, esse’s, and plenty of gringo wannabes! Hares throw out the 10 minute sign and were off. Straight into the crowds of partiers the trail starts taking shape. Crunchy running true trail and blazing forward thru masses of people, Cakehole and myself laying checks and FRB’s. Over the bridge and into the local streets. As we lay trail the soothing songs of the mariachi bands are all around us. Graffiti lines the walls of the roads we’re running thru as we tuck into the Vernor tunnel and pop out in front of the train depot, heading towards Corktown. We pass Old Tigers stadium and the plan of running the bases is quickly crushed as the historical baseball league is only in the 6th inning. Over the 75 walking bridge, another FRB and a Turkey/Eagle split before the BN at Nancy Whiskeys. Crunchy runs the Turkey, Cakehole and myself take the Eagle. Time to head to the casino. Motor City here we come, we throw a check down and pull a quickie into the parking garage. Three strides into the casino parking garage and were busted, Security on us like a hobo on a ham sandwich. Back to the sidewalk as we make our way around the casino and back towards the BN. Arriving at the BN we quickly learn that we have been had!
Greeted by Crunchy, beers in hand was a wonderful sight, finding out that everybody was already there….BUMMER! The patio was packed with patrons and hashers drinking and enjoying the great day. Piñatas being beaten and the consumption of beers continues. Hares are off and the last leg is being conceived. Back into Corktown and down Michigan Ave towards Mexican Town. Left on West Grand Blvd and were heading into the heart of party central, and maybe a gang shooting…OOPS! Close to the On-In and we leave the last few FRB’s. The On-In circle up was MC’d by the one the only Semper Pi and along with the normal celebrating, Cakehole was awarded his 25th haring mug! Congratulations Cakehole! Also Special congratulations to our graduates , Merkin and Spank Bank! May your future be full of happiness and success!
To my co-hares Crunchy and Cakehole a big thanks for making Cinco Hash a success.
On-On
P3